I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
