Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
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