Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
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