Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Randomize
