windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
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