tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Randomize
