so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Randomize
