now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Randomize
