Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
Randomize
