Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
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