dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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