Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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