i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
honey bunches of taint.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
Randomize
