never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
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