For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
Randomize
