i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
