During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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