That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
He's on the porch naked. Help.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Randomize
