This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
Randomize
