Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize
