Pants 0. Shit 1.
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
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