I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
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