He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
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