But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Randomize