You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Randomize
