you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize
