She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
