six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
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