last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
