Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
I think I just sharted jello shots
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