Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
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