I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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