He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
Mom said you looked used
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
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