im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
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