1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
Randomize
