I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
