we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
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