Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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