How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
