Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
Randomize
