Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize