the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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