Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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