If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize
