I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize