i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Randomize
