David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Randomize
