I like to think it a success when the cops are called
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
Enjoy the penises
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
