So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
Randomize
