So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
I checked into jail on foursquare
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
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